My first growlings

Started reading that book and I have say, I've come to a conclusion that I didn't expect.

Bears are pretty damn educated. Why now would I say that? If you look at the stereotype the bears put out there, you see a big, burly man who is comforting but has the dimwit of masculinity that has been perpetuated by our society. They grunt to show appreciation.

But I started reading. Now, understand, I had the tshirts, hats and saw the calendars. Pictures, really, and there was no connection. But when you see academics discussing concepts like sub-cultures and details of the like, you know you're hearing some really smart-smart talks.

Bears are smart, it seems.

I mean, as I'm reading this, I'm realizing a large portion of this mini-group in the large gay population has basically created a movement. Not let's define a movement. That's when people rise up against tyranny and wrongdoing. But the gay community has done nothing wrong.

But it has. It's harpooned me numerous times before. THe fact is, I'm round. I'm a big, bruly man, fat as VW bug only less appealing. I spent my first years of coming ougt dealing with the added stress of not being a clone of every model found in GQ magazine. It hurt. Badly. I spent many a night alone.

And now I'm realizing, I wasn't. There was this small group of men like myself. Smart men. And instead of getting angry, they hung together and went to clubs together. They danced together. They used their collective support system to walk and talk to the clone young men and get a date or two.

And it worked.

I don't know about you, but the stupid way to do it would be to get angry. Anger creates enemies. But this Bear community decided to play the game their way, but making more friends both within and then outside.

That sounds smart to me.

And I like it. I see these men give each other huge Bear-hugs whereever they go and it shows me something--that they accept everyone into their little group. In fact, the book I'm reading really warns against labeling the Bear community fully. For when we define it totally, that leaves out some people. And that is not what the Bears wish to do. They want everyone to dance with them.

I'm reminded of the Tao and how Lao-Tzu was so reluctant to put the philosophy down on paper for the same reason...

Great. Finding Taoism in Bear culture. That's just weird.

But it's smart. Just like a bear.